Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
