So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize