You're my little dorito
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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