just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
