lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize