i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I have already put on my inside pants.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
