so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
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