okay pat passed out under dana's car
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
