allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Randomize
