If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
