So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize