I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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