Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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