And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
