On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
No subtext here. People are naked.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
