Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
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