he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I stole a fireplace last night.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
