Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
