Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize