nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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