yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
