Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
