I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
