so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
