Your tits are I can't wait for
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
