yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
