well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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