I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Randomize
