you guys were way drunker than both of me
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
