Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
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I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
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I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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