It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
