everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize