so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
this will be a night to untag.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
