that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Welp...herpes.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
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I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
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I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
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