ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize