New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I just had sex on a roof
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
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