Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize