Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Randomize
