i jhust puked up my retainher.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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