Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
