just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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