**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize