He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Just pee around me
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
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