so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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