last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I checked into jail on foursquare
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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