i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
