check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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