Grow some girl-balls and come out already
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
