I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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