i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
