Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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